My Ironworker

I sure do love my hard working man. So, so much. Here he is getting ready for a new job he started this evening, working nights for the next 2 weeks.
I'm so thankful for him!

Broken

This week has been a doozy.
I'm reading Matthew right now, reading how Jesus was, how he walked and talked, how he healed... but mostly how he loved. How he overwhelmingly cared. How his heart ached and broke for the world.
This week, as I'm surrounded again by the cuts and scars and gaping wounds of life, and my own heart overflows with empathetic pain for those I love, I wondered, how must he have felt... How must he feel? Because even though I spent most of the day crying and asking him to love on bruised and bloodied little hearts, I know it's a grain of sand compared to his intense and unending love... and my heart can't comprehend the pain that He must feel for us. How our sin and mistakes must crush him, and how, if I had to feel such a love, I couldn't bear it.
His heart is so full, and yet so willing and able to bear my feeble load. His arms so ready to accept my sadness or hurt, and how ready his ears are to listen to the prayers for the ones he ever desires to save. I am so, so small and inept, insignificant and incompetent, and He is all that I am not.
I am so, so thankful for the Father God that carries me.

Not in Myself

I went through my blog a few days ago, reading my posts from the last 3 New Year's. Life has certainly gone places I didn't expect!

I am very, very happy and thankful for where it has gone.

I have been very lost... "all we like sheep have gone astray..." And that has been me. Looking back, it still would be me, but that I have a Good Shepherd, following after me and pulling me back, redirecting and guiding my steps.

He has been so good to me, full of undeserving mercy!

I have a verse marked in my bible, ironically from around 3 years ago, that I found again just last week. And I think I've been coming to know it these last few years especially...

"O Lord, I know that the way of man is not in himself: it is not in man that walketh to direct his steps."

How crazy and miraculous life has been! Thinking back to what I've wanted, the steps I desperately wanted to choose, the way I wanted my life to go... causes me to thank Him vehemently for what HE chose instead.

He is so intensely, undeniably good, and I want with all my heart to step rightly in line with Him. No more fighting or doubting His ways and plans... I desperately want to learn to just rest and trust and serve my Maker wholly in this life He's given me.

New Baby!

It's a new year! And with it came a brand new love, another bitty being to pour love into and cherish with all my heart.
Raynor Caleb was born on January 1, 2015, weighing 8 pounds, 2 ounces.
I cannot wait to snuggle his adorable little self for hours!